SINGLES GOING STROONADIER'N THEY'VE EVER BEEN!

Some of the seven-inchers I've been sampling as of late. Old faves and a few newies in the batch. Take a chance for once you lazy being!

Treponen Pal-"Other Life"/"Solitude" (Gerard Tourier Records)

Haw! I actually snapped this disque up thinking that these Treponen Pal guys were thee same group who released a bunch of hot industrial strength electronic heavy metal records in the late-eighties! Naw, this is another group named after that syphilitic condition who were wallowing about in France a good ten or so years earlier and that, dear pard, is where the coincidence ends!

A-side is total wimp, typical brainless AM at its mid-seventies worst dribble that would appeal to those gals you knew who actually liked the tepid tunes of the day like "Chevy Van" and "Undercover Angel" but you agreed with their musical tastes in the hopes of going farther than first base. Flipster fairs slightly better what with a neo-"20th Century Boy" riff that still doesn't get off the ground but sounds boffo when played against the plug side. Not quite the European experience in under-the-covers rock music that I was hopin' for, but eh!

***

The Roamers-"Be True To Your School"/"Joanne Kay-"Wonderful Summer" (Hit Records)

Here's one I "inherited" from an older cousin, this undoubtedly one of the efforts of some knockoff label that specialized in releasing cover versions of the latest hits for both the dumbos and the tightwads. Ya know, people who didn't want to dish out the full price for the primo cut or best yet were too stoopid to tell the difference, so's they figured that a budget single would still get 'em in good with precious daughter because maybe SHE was such a stoop that didn't know better herself!

The reasons behind my cuz obtaining this does stymie me, because her parents used to get her and the rest of the brood the real deal items alla time! By no means were they penny pinching pikers like the folk I got! But for the price it musta cost them (and since I got it free!) the purpose was served because hey, these "Roamers" sound fairly close to the original Beach Boys (no cigars tho!) while Joanne Kay coulda been a big enuff singer herself had she made the right connections and the right motel for that matter! And ya gotta admit...back when this came out the seventysome pennies it cost for a single was sure a lotta money to pour down a rathole, as my father would still say!

***

Jeri Rossi-"I Left My Heart But I Don't Know Where"/"It's a Mans Mans Mans World" (Local Anesthetic Records)

Rossi's yet another one of those oft-loathed early eighties performers who used to dredge up more'n her share of fanzine-related bile. but I never exactly knew why she was thought of in such a disdainful way. After all, her recordings weren't anything calculated to make a full-blooded rock 'n roll maniac cringe and in fact her neo-Patti Smith cum Lydia Lunch posture sure came off better than some of the armchair boho feminist types around not only then but for many years after. This particular single has Rossi stretching her vocal cords and guitar chords for that matter on a couple of trax that still mingle around in late-seventies dark decadence without succumbing to the fetid post-no wave put on shock that always fell flat on its face. The James Brown cover even has that 13/13 lunge to it and if she was nada but a nth rate copycat as many had pegged her as well, we needed MORE nth rate copycats like her ifyaknowaddamean...

***

Your Funeral-"I Want To Be You"/"Final Abyss" (Local Anesthetic Records)

Another Rossi effort, this time with what I would assume was her reg'lar backing band. An all-gal group too, and boy (girl?) do they make most of those all-femme acts more concerned either with their pudenda or politics sound like the standard eighties above-it-all types they most certainly WERE.  More of that dark neo-goth style that did pop up on Rossi's other effort rears its not-so-ugly head here, yet these numbers are still together enough to the point where you sure couldn't call these babes a Go Gos cheap cash-in for the gnu wave bux! I'd only hate to hear what this woulda sounded like a good five years from its 1982 launch, but I have faith that Your Funeral woulda transcended most of the lame punque political fashion post that ruined the entire genre for ages on end.

***

The Shadows of Knight-"Gloria"/"Dark Side: (Atlantic Golden Series Records)

When I grabbed this 'un up at the Musicland in Niles Ohio way back May 1977 boy was I happy! I kinda thought that bands like the Shadows of Knight and their NUGGETS brethren had totally vanished from the record store scene and here I was actually latching onto this million dollar (or so I thought!) goodie! And it was fantab too, rushing adrenaline into my veins upon first spin with that twangy guitar riff driving that whole mid-Amerigan suburban slob message into me in just the same way those GILLIGAN'S ISLAND reruns did! And hey, if yer a teenbo and that sound doesn't affect you all I gotta say is that you might be ready for that brain pressure reduction surgery a whole lot sooner than you had originally gambled on. Even the bluesy flip was mesmerizing enough too...what a double headed winner that made me feel glad that my mere pittance did got a lot farther than I woulda thunk inna first place!

Oh, and I got a cutout cassette of the first Stooges album that very day which I must admit did NOT affect me in the least! Too muddy with an overdose bass drowning everything out. It wasn't until I heard the album proper that it became a top spin but sheesh, you'd think even a DEFECTIVE copy of the debut Stooges record'd be better than no Stooges at all!

***

Rob Tyner and the Hot Rods-"Till The Night Is Gone (Let's Rock)"/"Flipside Rock" (Island Records, England)

It definitely was pure genius to team up the former MC5 frontman with England's then-upstart punk rockers Eddie and the Hot Rods, and the resultant spew is naturally about as on target as you would expect. Sure Tyner sounds like an older and battered man far from the pushing twenty pseudo-intellectual he most certainly once was, but the results are pretty snappy and don't make you wanna cringe the way fanz of the original Mothers of Invention mighta once they heard ZOOT ALLURES (well, that was the one that did it for me rather well!). Kinda strange tho---if the entire Tyner/Rods meeting was arranged by the NEW MUSICAL EXPRESS howcum SOUNDS's own Giovanni Dadomo's cyster (and well known photographer in her own right) Eve's singing back up on the thing?!?!?

***

Bob Dylan-"Tonight I'll Be Staying Here With You"/"Country Pie" (Columbia Records)

Not bad a-tall Dylan single that shoulda done better than the mid-reaches of the charts. Kinda bounce-y swinger/songwriter approach that is fair enough in the fact that I could even compare it to Elliot Murphy (something I prefer to do when measuring up solo guys with rockist chips on their shoulders). Flipster's once again one of those "double entendre" things that would have gotten you into a lotta hot water had you submitted this for English class...t'is still a good number from a guy who I can't figure on how much I hate him until I hear something like this then I like him until I hear something else that makes me hate him even more!

***

The Box Tops-"Sweet Cream Ladies Forward March"/"I See Only Sunshine" (Mala Records)

Another one I inherited from my cousin proving that she had a whole lot more taste in the music department than some of the records I got outta her collection would have attested to. Alex Chilton proves his worth even when under the heavy reigns of the record industry on the smooth Southern soul track that I'm surprised didn't hit as big as the other 'uns. Maybe the song was kinda...y'know...dirty what with the title and all. The flip should have been the side to hit tho with its smooth mid-south country soul style. Another boffo effort from Alex Chilton and company long before he became that cult figure that nerdy altrock types look towards as if his magic would ever rub off on their geeky essence.

***

The Village Stompers-"Washington Square"/"Turkish Delight" (Epic Records)

This single really dredges up the WAY BACK memories since I used to spin this up at my cousin's place where they had a small record player in their basement rec. room, and me and him used to walk around the room while it played because we thought that's what they did on AMERIGAN BANDSTAND. Sheesh, those banjo strains sure make me wanna revert back to age three (which is an easy thing for me to do---no kiddin'!) just so's I could relive a part of my childhood that was rather fun and exciting given all the opportunities us ranch house kids had! Or at least more exciting than anything that's happening these days! The flip's a dixieized version of "Hungarian Rhapsody" that sounds fine to me even if woulda made your 90-year-old gramma upchuck her Geritol---sheesh, who sez 1963 was a lousy year for music anyway???

***

Ray Charles-"In the Heat of the Night"/"Something's Got to Change" (ABC Records)

An expected-as-usual hot single from Charles long before he didn't have to stoop so low as to record "Ameriga the Beautiful" (even though his take has more verve to it than any jingoistic paens heard from the eighties on). The theme to the moom pitcher of the same name's probably way snazzier than the actual thing (never did see it!) with its moving groove, while the flip goes to show you that even co-author Billy Preston was put to some good use in this world. (Even though you could just tell he was only hanging out with Charles and the Beatles in order to further his own comparatively snoozoid solo career.) I guess Charles was one guy who really deserved getting all those tee-vee roles and commercial endorsements even if I always thought those voice overs of his were actually done by keen imitators!

***

David Bowie-"Sorrow"/"Amsterdam" (RCA Victor Records)

Only Bowie could have turned the McCoys' track into martinis and munchos mingle music for the better off amongst us. Makes me glad that I sat out the PIN UPS album all these years. Somehow I do cozy up to his take on Jacques Brel's "Amsterdam" even though I never did like that dirty Frenchman's work because well...he was a sicko. Still, these sorta solo acoustic passionate plods can hit 'cha in certain ways and believe-it-or-not but "Amsterdam" does have a certain thrill-chill to it that makes it almost worthwhile. A definite keeper that I'm gonna stick in my collection right next to Arnold Corns.

***

The Wipers-ALIEN BOY EP (Park Avenue Records)

These guys were pretty much the CRITICS DARLINGS back inna eighties, which just might be one reason why I had shied away from their music for the past three or so decades. But hey, as Aesop's son said, "Time wounds all heels" and maybe now I can settle back and listen to their music without being reminded of Gerard Cosloy!

Anyhoo, Hans Jurgen Klitsch was right when he was callin' the Wipers the best bunch he's heard since the Pink Fairies...after all both groups had the three-piece approach down pat as well as a driving force that seemed absent in the gnashing of teeth that was passing for punk rock during those rather feh days. And the Wipers also had a good extra ten years of rock 'n roll education to absorb which made 'em one of the brighter spots in the under-the-counterculture of the day which was really beginning to fail on all fronts.

This is their first, or one of 'em, back when they were on Park Avenue Records in the Pacific Northwest long before that area became that hippydippy punque anarcho-sissy headquarters of these here United States. If I were payin' more attention, I'd kinda wonder whatever happened to 'em.

***

Vox Pop-"Cab Driver"/"Just Like Your Mom" (Bad Trip Records)

Neat-o outta-the-way rarity from the same label that gave us the Angry Samoans, featuring the same kinda heavy metal disguised as punk rock that the Samoans proudly featured during their early years. It's got such a great approach to the higher end of ear plummification to it that I'm even tempted to dig into the ol' collection to find that 12-inch single on Mystic Records with Paul Cutler flashing his bod for the sake of all their homo fans. It's one of those records I'm glad I glommed onto before it skyrocketed in price, and if you weren't as smart as I was and shall remain maybe you could hear this via the KILLED BY DEATH series (I'm sure there are a few of those in your collection and if not---why?).

***

Third Rail-"It's a Surprise"/"Take That"  (Long View Records)

Third and I believe final Third Rail single with Richard Nolan and a new group of Rails playing a more pop-oriented rock that don't sound much like their first two releases! An interesting change with synthesizer added in to modify things I guess, and frankly I sure wouldn't mind hearing even more Third Rail if the material I've experienced so far has been that good. Maybe a compilation of tracks from the band's earliest days until the end would be most welcome, complete with annotated notes and all those great things we've come to expect from the few companies still willing to dish out these archival wonders to the few remaining rock 'n roll droolers that are left of this once-high energy planet of ours.

***

The Naked Cage House Band-"Track Dog"/"Rolling in Clover" (Shoestring Records)

For all intent purposes this is a Third Rail offering, released in the otherwise dark and dismal year of 1988 when for the most part the rabid sounds and ideals of the guttural seventies had been washed away by the geeky goo passing as music. Or so I was led to believe---Nolan sounds as strong as ever here and although I can detect a number of instances where the music might be veering off into that flashy new-unto-gnu wave style this still beats much of the big-time amerindergroundindie stuff that I had the mispleasure of listening to at the time. Sheesh, if I had only known that Nolan was still up and about at the time maybe I wouldn't have been so down in the dumps about the state of rock 'n roll as prefab showy tee-vee glitz...blame the fanzines, not me kid!

***

The Cleveland Cuties-"If I Only Had the Bomb"/"Could She Love Me", "Pregnant Molly" 7-inch EP (Precious Records)

Dunno if this actually is the first self-produced independent record to come outta Cle as I've been told, but if it is the whole DIY ethos sure got off to a good start. The Brian Sands/Milk/Brian and the Juniors axis comes together (without Brian) to create some local Power Pop the way it shoulda been done, with loads of hard riffs, punchy melodies and (best of all) a sense of humor that could only come outta the land of Ghoulardi. Side "A" has Al Globekar not only crunching out some top leads but singing about his desire for true justice via the a-bomb, while on the flip Dennis Carleton sings modern love songs that I don't even think Jonathan Richman woulda thought up! And future Juniors drummer Mac Chafer bangs his way through the whole thing with perfect aplomb as well!

***

The Dillards-"Reason to Believe"/"Nobody Knows" (Elektra Records)

You probably only know the Dillards through their various ANDY GRIFFITH SHOW appearances as the Darling boys, but later on they did have quite a country rock career not only when they were hangin' out with various ex-Byrds but on their lonesome as well. The a-side has the boys tackling a Tim Hardin track and doin' it rather fairly well---maybe if they cracked a fart or two it woulda been more authentic. Flip is an original that, like the plug side, has that late-sixties gloss that actually gives this song a commercial edge that mighta pushed 'em over the "made it" line an' who could blame 'em! Nothing shattering, but it still has a "twing" to it that makes the thing a "keepie"!

***

Cabaret Voltaire-EXTENDED PLAY EP (Rough Trade Records, England)


This particular platter sure brings up a whole lotta memories, not only of the joys of receiving a new Systematic catalog but wonderin' where I was gonna get alla the money to pay for the records I oh so dearly wanted! This ain't exactly the kind of thing I went for back when the seventies/eighties cusp was up and about, but years later I can easily see just how these not-so-addled electronic rock fans merged the best of the late-sixties rebellion in sound (I'm talking Velvet Underground, not those putrid examples oft banded about by elderly enemies of music as that epitomized everything that was wrong with Teenbo Ameriga) with the new cyborg anti-humanism that was so drastically needed and, come to think of it, still is. Too bad Cabaret Voltaire eventually ended up as yet another post-disco ance band because if they kept up with what they started out with...whew!

MOOM PITCHER REVIEW! THE TWO GLADIATORS, STARRING RICHARD HARRISON, MIMMO PALMARA AND GUILIANO GEMMA! (1964)

These sword 'n sandals spectaculars tend to get me even more bored than a hillbilly at a dental hygiene seminar, but I gotta say that this particular pelicula was a real wowzer. True, there area few snoozeroo parts here and there, but right when you're ready to get up to do a number one the action builds up into an exciting fight complete with all of the clanking of sword onto shield that your li'l ol' heart can stand. And I do hope you have a suitable enough stain remover for your comfy chair.

Amerigan ex-pat Richard Harrison stars as Lucius Crassius, a luckier'n you'll ever be warrior who just happens to be the long-gone twin brother of the new Roman emperor, a sadistic sicko by the name of Commodus (played by Mimmo Palmara...what kinda human'd name her kid "Mimmo" anyhow?), a former gladiator himself who happens to be even crueler'n the likes of Caligula and he sure lets you know it in the first scene when he shows no mercy to an easily defeated punko who not-so-surprisingly enough predicts Commodus' own fate. Maybe I shoulda put a "Spoiler Alert" somewhere above, but frankly I know that NONE of ya are gonna wanna watch this kinda film anyway so why bother?

Lest you think that this is, by my mere mention of Caligula, is gonna be a moom pitcher anywhere nears the likes of the Bob Guccione-helmed effort of a few decades back don't worry. No tied up foreskins or golden showers are to be seen, but you do get a hefty amount of All-Amerigan fun time violence that you used to get on Saturday afternoon tee-vee until the moral superiors around us decided to make even that as boring as their own tired existences! 

Thankfully this pitcher plays it pretty straight without the usual dullsville sidesteps---even the brief romantic angle gets squashed by a confrontation so's you li'l boys don't hafta get sick like you would with similar efforts. So if you're an action-packed kid who is hotcha for thrills galore and doesn't want that much to get inna way of alla those gruesome jabs and moans well...if this were on tee-vee some rainy afternoon and your cyster was watching Shirley Temple on the other station you have every RIGHT  to bash her skull in so's you could watch something that you'd really like 'stead of all that prissy mewl that everyone wants to force down your throat!

It doesn't take much to please me. Just gimme a back of Cheetos (fried to a crackly crunch) and a glass of Hawaiian Punch and I'm in suburban slob heaven. It also helps if there's something great onna tube like an old Hanna Barbera cartoon (hey Boomerang, what's wrong with ya???) or some soul-stirring music on the boom box or what passes for my stereo system (wouldja believe I NEVER owned a proper stereo with big speakers and an amplifier 'n all that?---it was always a turntable run through a beat up boom box or something even more primitive when it came to living high off the hog on depression-era wages for me!). But like Ted Berrigan once said, I'm doin' all right!

Thankfully the big joy in my life these days is watching ROUTE 66 reruns being shown via FETV! Yeah, I sure wish they were being shown on a local tee-vee station for FREE 'n all, but at this late date in life (mine, at least!) why should I complain! Anyway, it's sure a hoot (and brings back old memories of the days when Chevrolet would sponsor the show what with those commercials showing the new models placed upon some desert plateaus in a most striking way) what with Martin Milner and George Maharis drivin' about from place to place and getting into all sortsa early-sixties type adventures without succumbing to that whole EASY RIDER looking for Ameriga headiness that eventually seeped its way into television programming as the years rolled by.

These hold up a whole lot better'n any of your doubters would expect. In fact, if I were well-versed in various eighties-nineties hour long dramas (wouldja believe the last one I saw was an episode of ST. ELSEWHERE or two? ---and that was bad enough!) I'd say the ROUTE 66 holds up much better'n any of those would had I been aware enough to judge them. These episodes are sleek, to-the-point and like NAKED CITY or BEN CASEY (two series they oughta bring back and like now!) you can easily get sucked in because even though this is all tee-vee and make-believe, these shows seem to fit into life the way YOU see it more'n all the overly preachy and sanctimonious programming these past few decades ever could. It's sure great to know that television programmers and advertisers were aware that there were people living in between New York City and Los Angeles back then.

Still awaiting the Youngstown Ohio one with Darrin McGavin...that should bring back a few memories of turdler-era trips back when all the mills were up and runnin' and given the sounds and billowing smoke that area could be a rather scary place for a three-year-old!

***

As yew-kan-cee, there are quite a few goodies for us all to slip into this week, and I ever tried my best to correct all the typos which that anal retentive nitpicker Brad Kohler seems to spot out with little if any effort! I guess goin' through the corn and picking out all the caterpillars at Cash Market will do that to a guy. Anyhoo, enjoy! Thanks again go to Bill Shute, Paul McGarry and Feeding Tube for the freebees, and to me for having a pair of ears and something substantial in between 'em to discern what is goin' on within those grooves!

Mozzaleum-DARK RIDE LP (Feeding Tube Records)

Mozzaleum? Isn't that the place where all dead pizzas go??? All funnin' aside, this is yet another fear-packed Feeding Tube record, ever so tastefully packaged (with beautiful orange puke vinyl) featuring some of that sonically jacked off music that this label is particularly known for. Sometimes I am reminded of a pretty messed up soundtrack to a moom pitcher that might be a little too weird for my tastes, while others have a sorta rock chug with electronic distortions that would madden the most serene of STEREO REVIEW subscribers in their knotty pine dens. It is hard to put into letters exactly how fringe on one hand yet straightforward rock-y this effort more certainly is.  If you go for the freakier aspects of that newer-than-new under-the-underground style of soundscapading well, you probably wore your copy out by now!

***

Nothing On Semble-CORNERS AND THEIR PLACES cassette (Feeding Tube Records)

It would be fitting that this effort was released on cassette. After all, everything you can say about Nothing On Semble seems to be based in that decade of decades we know as the seventies what with the archaic electronic keyboards and the overall performance which sounds like just about anyone USA's bedroom recordings that just happened to be heard outside of their own small clique. It ain't exactly the kinda progressive rock spew that was prevalent then, but some of you might think so what with the neo-Floydian chording, import bin classical touches and occasional buzzes that'll have you thinking krautrock before you even realize it.

Actually it's much better'n that because even with the mellotron strings and ARP intrusions there seems to be less'n the usual Yes-styled goop to contend with. It does come off headier than the English classical schmooze which is undoubtedly why this works a whole lot better on my system. Maybe even like Floyd right after Syd got the boot. But those vocals...sheesh!

***

The Plastic People of the Universe-TROUBLE EVERY DAY CD (Globus Music, Czech Republic)

I know most of you readers could care one whit, but I have TREMENDOUS RESPECT for the Plastic People and other under-the-underground Czech rockers not only for their ability to play rock 'n roll as it was meant to be in the early-seventies, but also for standing up to the EVIL powers that be when it mattered most. Yes, the Plastic People were fighting the GOOD CAUSE and suffering tremendously for doing so under circumstances that would have most of you pampered pudendas runnin' home to mama wif big baby tears in your eyes if Big Government threatened you in the same way.

Here they are in concert twixt 1971 and 1977 doing nothing but covers, eight by the Velvets, three by the Fugs and one by Zappa, and boy do they do 'em PROUD! True you can laff at the unintentional lyrical bloopers and jumble ups but if you do you are nothing but a SNOB no better'n those prog wags who complained that the Kingsmen couldn't play their instruments.

Overall the performances are top notch, about as good as any local Amerigan band from the same time or maybe  even better, and the sound is surprisingly clear as well in case you're a stickler for such things being the sophisticated one you mostcertainly are. You don't just get the feeling that you are listening to something clandestine, but something that can transcend time, age, maybe even your mentality and bring back all those early latent memories of just why you chose to listen to rock 'n roll for your own personal soundtrack instead of as for mere backdrop to something less stimulating. Rock As A Way of Life indeed!

 Extra kudos go to vocalist Paul Wilson for getting the perfect Lou Reed inflections on "Sweet Jane" and "Some Kinda Love", something you never did hear those acoustic mimeographed missies with their heavy duty makeup get down pat.

***

Various Artists-THE KNIGHTS OF FUZZ --- THE GARAGE AND PSYCHEDELIC MUSIC EXPLOSION, 1980-2000 CD-r burn (originally on None Records)

Remember back when it seemed that each and every rock 'n roll revved fanzine of the eighties devoted more'n just a few lines to the up-and-comin' garage band revival? Well, considerin' what little else was goin' on during those MTV-drenched days what else would you expect! This collection of various tracks from the Voxx Records archives and elsewhere proves that the entire movement was a whole lot more'n just cheap copycat approached to past accomplishments...much of this holds up rather well even here in the dark reaches of the late-teens and even those acts we thought a little too pretentious with their Sean Bonniwell poses sure sound a whole lot PURER that I originally believed. Maybe it's time I gather up all those old promos that are wasting about in the collection and give 'em a real run through one of these days! Yeah...RIGHT!!!

***

Oscar and the Majestics-NO CHANCE BABY CD-r burn (originally on Sundazed Records)

I know...even when """""I""""" think of Gary Indiana I think of that one family with the slavedriver father and the whole slew of children who were terrified into becoming one of the bigger music sensations (for worse or worse-r) o'er the past few decades. But there was more to Gary Indiana such as this group whose boffo local singles (and more) were collected on this neeto disque much to the satisfaction of any true six-oh collector and aficionado. Oscar and the Majestics had that '66 pounce down pretty good---and true some wags might consider their entire reason for existence to be mere downer groove tones that most every other batch of high stool sophomores were layin' down at the time, but I find these guys bared-wire intense enough for my own tastes when their teenbo dander gets rowled up enough. Just don't try chucklin' when you hear the background vocals on "I Can't Explain"!

***

Waylon Speed-HORSESHOES AND HAND GRENADES CD-r burn (originally on Crow on Ten Records)

More post-Byrds/Burritos-styled country and western-tinged rock 'n roll that, in this case, sounds rather authentico yet leaves this soul a li'l bit more'n addled. I'm sure that more'na few students of the form could wax eloquent (or wax bikini lines for that matter) over this and while I find the numbers snappy and quite well crafted I gotta say that I don't think this one quite measures up to previous country-unto-rock and vice-versa efforts from past practitioners like Gram Parsons on down. Well, at least it beats all holy heck outta the Eagles and for that Waylon Speed ought to get ALL THE GOLD STARS IN THE WORLD!!!

(Note to Paul who sent this---are the final tracks on this disque Waylon Speed or a totally unrelated halfway-decent hard rock act? Those instrumentals sound rather non-country if ya ask me and like, some of it is pretty good in its own dull thud way.)

***

Frolk Haven-AT THE APEX OF HIGH CD-r burn

Future Police drummer Stewart Copeland's presence on this self-produced spin better not deter you from hearing this, for this album is just about everything I go for as far as home-made neo-jazz avant rock music goes! Low fidelity free splats of sound give way to more than halfway decent riff rock that has the same self-produced feel as the White Light album with its stilted yet driving crunch of an approach. It sounds exactly like what I would imagine a buncha kids with the instruments and the money not forgetting the hard into the whole under-the-underground mindset to have put out back 1973 way, to little or no huzzahs of course. After hearing it you'll wonder why it went from this to "Don't Stand So Close To Me" within the span of a good seven years.

***

Various Artists-EASTSIDE STRANGER JUDGE DEL-SATIN CD-r burn (Bill Shute)

If Bill were in my presence he'd get a nice swift kick inna pants for slapping on that adolescent art project music known as "Unrest, Work & Play" (Beefheart would weep!) but the Paul Revere and the Raiders "Judge" ad was swell as were the Eastside Kids who unfortunately did not have Scruno in their ranks at the time. The skiffle thing and Monkees HEAD ad didn't quite fit in with my mood while the Scabs' punk thing had some good imitation of the biggies' spirit but, as expected, was done better before. Overall (and that includes the early-sixties gal singer flop) it passes the mustard, but I dunno if I'd put any on my sausage sandwich.

***

I've been trying to unload these BLACK TO COMM back issues for a longer time than you can imagine, and you can just bet your own bottom buck that you don't have all of the thoughtful, insightful and downright entertaining issues of this mag that you need in your collection! Instead of betting that bottom dollar, how about sending it in to me (along with a few more bottom dollars!) for some of these award-losing and generally scorned mags that, given the Bizarro Rock World we live in, proves they're good!

BOOK REVIEW! VOLUME : INTERNATIONAL DISCOGRAPHY OF THE NEW WAVE conceived and edited by B. George and Martha Da Foe (One Ten Books, 1980)

Talk about all the funtime memories I used to have pourin' through this one! As far as any sorta cool guide to the groovy groups and even groovier records went many of us struggling suburban slob types depended on VOLUME. It was at least one reliable source of music-based info that helped us find out just what records were available and who did what 'n all that fun rot you sure didn't find about in Anastasia Pantsios' column! And even though this book was already obsolete a good minute or two after it was unleashed and there were about as many goofs and other gaffes as you could find in any random issue of BLACK TO COMM, it sure was a boon in a world where rock on a mainstream AM/FM /rock press mafia level was at its dreariest in years. And with most "experts" on the form feeding from the trough of the same folk who were content to exploit the more "cultured" and "effete" aspects of youth at the expense of the BIG BEAT, books like VOLUME meant all the more to us as we saw our favorite musical past time slowly dying right in front of our bloodshot brains.

But here it all is, new wave on the cusp of becoming gnu wave (copyright 1982 Bill Shute) still being presented to us  in that rather neo-decadent (even with the ancient clip art adorning the imaginative layout) style that sure stood out against what the powers that be were force feeding more'n a few gullible groupers out there in fishtankland. Sure, some of the inclusions are high-larious (as if I would have ever considered Ash Ra anywhere in or about the underground idiom and by the way how does Eno rate so much space?) but when an honest error sure fits in such as when some sixties garage band on Moxie like the Huns pop onto the list I get the feeling that the people who crafted this one really are smarter'n we peons in the audience have given 'em credit for! The overall brashness and guesswork and at times inclusions of records that might have been announced but never made it do give VOLUME an edge that you didn't see when perusing any of the other new wave discogs that were comin' out at the time!

'n besides that, VOLUME even features listings for local clubs ('n it's so old even Max's Kansas City gets a shout out!) and pertinent record labels as well as an accurate as these things can be list of current (and not so) fanzines that helped me as a guide back then and continues to long after you woulda thought this book served its purpose. Again decidedly non-under-the-underground reads like TIME BARRIER EXPRESS, COMSTOCK LODE and THUNDER ROAD!?!?!?!? get the nods as does Cleveland free weekly paper SCENE (which never did doody for the local underground scene unless you're talking about Pantsios bait like the Adults), but so do faves like BACK DOOR MAN, NEW AGE and YOUNG, FAST AND SCIENTIFIC so inna end all cums out swell.

Of course with what we know now and all of the dug up rot we've found out about our fave seventies trailblazers (or not), this reads more like a "period piece" (and I don't mean something your sick-ass galpal would read to get her mind off "tick tock time"). But oh what a period it was and what a piece, and as far as capturing the zeit before it geisted out VOLUME sure makes for a reminder of what times were like when we...really...thought the eighties were gonna encapsulate everything gnarly and feral the sixties and seventies (fifties even!) offered us and take the entire kaboodle into overdrive! The way it turned out with even Lou Reed and Iggy Pop making duff platters it just shows you how all the best intentions and toil could go down the dumpster without any of us even knowin' it!

MOOM PITCHER REVIEW BY BILL SHUTE! THE ISLAND MONSTER (Italy, 1954) starring BORIS KARLOFF!

First of all, THE ISLAND MONSTER is not a horror film. The “monster” of the title is a monster in the broader sense—a narcotics kingpin whose organization is run from an island not far from the Italian coast. This film gets a bad rap, with people pointing out that it’s Boris Karloff’s worst film. Maybe it is. However, attacking a film such as this is like shooting fish in a barrel. Forgetting BK’s presence for a minute, it’s no better or worse than the average early 50’s low-budget crime programmer from Spain or Mexico or France or the UK….it’s kind of like an Italian version of a Lippert crime film. It’s competently photographed, the editing is not lazy, it mixes location shooting with interiors, the musical score is adequate, it has a convincingly seedy atmosphere as you’d want in a crime film about the drug trade, it has nightclub sequences (always a plus in a crime film), and it moves well. If you lived in Italy and this was at your local low-priced neighborhood theater on a double bill, it would be a good way to kill 85 minutes after a long work-week. People who complain about the film have probably not seen the bread-and-butter crime films of the period from low-budget producers in Latin America or Europe.

Then people complain about the dubbing. Yes, the dubbing sounds like a radio drama overdubbed onto an already existing film, which in a sense it is. However, dubbing was still a bit crude in the early 50’s, and again, this is typical of what you got in the period….no better, no worse. Anyone who watched old European B-movies on late night US television in the 60’s and 70’s can deal with the dubbing. For me, it does not get in the way. I’m used to it.

The reason most people have heard of THE ISLAND MONSTER is that Boris Karloff is in it. The reason the producers put the word MONSTER in the title is that Boris Karloff is in it. Undoubtedly, the producers felt that paying Karloff for 10 days work (or whatever) was worth the money in that the film could get overseas play dates it would not otherwise have gotten, and they were probably right, as it did get a US theatrical release on the drive-in circuit in 1957 (three years after its release) and from lobby cards I’ve seen, it was also released in Mexico. One problem of course is that the producers did not keep Mr. Karloff around to dub the English track, which would have added another 3 or 4 days work to his fee. With an actor with such a unique voice, this was a mistake. However, to the dubbers’ credit, they DID have someone do a Karloff imitation, which I suppose is better than a bland and anonymous voice. The ”imitation” is about as good as someone at your workplace doing a Cagney impression at the last office party, but at least you can tell who is being imitated. For someone watching this at 3 a.m. on a small black and white TV in 1965 on a UHF station in Great Falls, Montana, after a can or two of Olympia beer, it probably worked OK.

Karloff gives a very enthusiastic, PHYSICAL performance in the film, perhaps knowing that he would not be heard. When we first meet him, the kindly older doctor who helps the poor, he’s all charm and warmth, with just a slight something “off.” Then he vanishes for about 25 minutes, and when he’s back, he’s a brutal, child-kidnapping drug lord. The main story follows a police investigator on the case of a drug ring whose trail seems to follow the travels of a certain nightclub singer. His child is kidnapped by the criminals. You’d think that they’d blackmail him, but that angle is left undeveloped after being briefly introduced. Also, the real climactic “work” on breaking the case is done by a dog!

More than anything, THE ISLAND MONSTER reminds me of some of the 1950’s Mexican crime programmers I saw on Spanish language TV in the early 80’s, in the early days of cable when networks had many hours to fill, and cheap older films were the perfect filler. My Spanish was just enough to follow the plot (unless you had a fast-talking character who used a lot of slang!)—it’s not like there is much originality in a crime film, so you weren’t thrown many curves. Those were also competently made, featured the usual character types, had nightclub sequences, and moved with a good pace.

Anyone who loves Boris Karloff’s work would probably enjoy watching THE ISLAND MONSTER, in the same way that Christopher Lee fans can watch the German SHERLOCK HOLMES AND THE DEADLY NECKLACE, in which he’s dubbed by someone else, and still appreciate the master’s presence and whatever good elements the film has (that one had excellent atmosphere—like the German Edgar Wallace adaptations of the period set in a Germanic faux-England). I’d enjoy this film for what it is—an entertaining way to kill 85 minutes—if it did not have Boris Karloff in it because I enjoy low-budget crime programmers, pulp crime stories, crime comics, etc. WITH Karloff in it, it’s just icing on the cake. In an interview, BK stated that he had a great time in the beautiful area where the film was shot. The hard-working Karloff deserved a nice vacation.

The 50’s were not the greatest period in Karloff’s career in terms of movie visibility. He worked primarily in television (though he had a lot of credits there), and his film credits were spotty—the odd SABAKA after this (which I hope to review for BTC soon), the low-budget VOODOO ISLAND and FRANKENSTEIN 1970. It wasn’t until the British double-header of THE HAUNTED STRANGLER and CORRIDORS OF BLOOD that he started riding the wave of renewed attention that lasted until his death…and continues today, where he’s still revered as both one of the all-time greats of horror AND a first-rate character actor in non-horror films, even this one.

Oh, one nice touch...for those who make it to the end...is that in the final scene, Karloff is carrying the body of the kidnapped girl, running near the sea, and the scene is clearly a homage to the original 1932 Frankenstein, where the monster carries the girl who trusts him alongside the lake….and then drowns her.

Dunno why, but it's a shorter'n expected episode of BLOG TO COMM this week, a big surprise because frankly I've had a lot more time on my hands'n usual to crank one of these wonders out! This misfortune is probably because of the dearth of rock 'n roll AS A WAY OF LIFE that's up and about here in the late-teens but hey, that's been the case for the past forty year so why bother complain' right now! It's kinda like complainin' that GILLIGAN'S ISLAND is off the air! Let's just chalk it up to laziness, lethargy and the lack of high energy get up and kick 'em out sounds permeating my brain these days. But as you will see, a few of these sounds have made their way to my cranium and that's nothing to ah-choo at.

But pad this post out I will, and in the most boring, unengaging way possible with some personal recollections taken from my own life. Lessee...other'n picking a booger outta my nose that looked kinda like Texas...first off I gotta tell ya that I finally got to see the original version of THE MAD BOMBER reviewed a week or so ago, this time via another Dee-Vee-Dee I got and will send to someone (either Paul McGarry or Brad Kohler, the other gets the tee-vee print I originally viewed) for Christmas this year. This 'un's the uncut version and boy is it a real hoot guaranteed to be more exciting'n watching the action goin' on in the other cars at the drive in! Now, the blood 'n corpses ain't anything that'll make you sick---in face you may like it! However there is more'n enough nudity here to get you locked in the bathroom for hours which ain't that hot in my book. After all, if I had a son I'd rather see him blow up buildings 'stead of screwing some girl. But if you're a blood and suckems kinda guy this moom pitcher'll have you up and revvin'! Now the big question is---who gets the tee-vee version and who gets the theatrical one, Brad or Paul???? Maybe you readers should decide!

***

And now, here be the reviews...I hope you can find some pertinent and perhaps even meaningful information in what I wrote below because hey, I sure can't! Agin, tanx goes to the usual miscreants like Bill, Paul and Feeding Tube and while I'm at it tanx to Bob Forward for the package of tapes which I will get to sometime, somehow, somewhere as that stoopid song in WEST SIDE STORY  once said.

Justice Yeldman-FRESH BOOKS LP (Feeding Tube Records)

Even more electronic weirdities from Feeding Tube, this one featuring more unabashed craziness that can sound either like testicular bubbling in Gigantus' groin or (as with the track called "Fresh Balls"!) the theme to a whacked out tee-vee cartoon they had the good sense to leave on the shelf. When it ain't brapping off into total cyborg anti-sound it reminds me of a synthesizer solo that Sun Ra mighta done for some early-seventies album yet forgot about because well, even he had a sense of sonic structure about him! You might find some of the melodies, when they appear, rather engaging. As far as the cover goes...good thing Jim Henson ain't here...he mighta sued.

***

Various Artists-HAVA NARGHILE CD (Dionysus Records)

For most people Turkey means Thanksgiving, taffy and hardcore porn but there's a lot more to the place as this disque proves. Compiled and annotated by Jay Dobis (see your recent GULCHERs and UGLY THINGS for more funtime information) HAVA NARGHILE proves to us that there is more to that middle-eastern nation than we'd think...in fact judging from the pics on the insides I kinda get the idea that the place is pretty fun what with alla them scantily-clad ladies about! From sixties garage band moodies (like the brilliant Yabansilar and their "Agit")  to biker moom pitcher incidental music and downright psychedelic heavy wonders, you get all of the late-sixties fun and jamz your poor little heart desires! It's sure funny hearing Turkish groups aping the Yardbirds who had swiping from various mid-Eastern musics for a good time already!

***

Jean Pierre Kalfon-BLACK MINESTRONE CD (New Rose Records, France)

The former Kalfon Rock Chaud leader (and noted French actor and recording star in his own right) gets into the post new (unto gnu) wave commercial yet snazz pop bag. Maybe he was the French David Johansen after all. Actually quite emotive in the French rock tradition yet with a neat spirit to it that keeps this from being yet another hasbeen slopster the likes of we've had too many these past umpteen years. The slick studio whiz doesn't even deter from the underlying decadent sleaze I was praying for. After listening to this I know why Elliot Murphy moved there!

***

The Challengers-SURFBEAT CD-r burn (originally on Vault Records, then Sundazed Records)

Here's one that takes me right back...to the summer of 1981 when, after absorbing the surf music issue of BOMP! with Jan and Dead taking Linda surfing on the cover, it was surf rock instrumentals and nothing but for this ever-buddin' hodaddy! Hi-Fidelity sound straight outta your dad's knotty pine rec room will bring back the memories of just what surf music meant during a time before youth hadda get all wrapped up in serious matters like destroying the world in the name of saving it. Re-dos of already established hits mixed in with a few originals make for a pretty neat-o flashback to a time which was better---if you weren't some mentally ill sexual mutation bent on making everyone else miserable because hey...we all gotta be "equal" 'n all that!

***

WHISKY A GO GO PRESENTS BILLY LEE RILEY CD-r burn (originally on Mercury Records)

Even if you can smell the Hai Karate this far away, you know this Billy Lee Riley live album is a better deal (as far as old faves gone bad) than what many former fifties rockers were up to once the mode of the music changed. Surprisingly entertaining covers of the hits and a far better way to stick around in the biz as opposed to writing and singing the theme from THE MARY TYLER MOORE SHOW.

***

Thee Mighty Caesars-BEWARE THE IDES OF MARCH CD-r burn (originally on Big Beat Records)

I must admit that I got a wee bit tired of Billy Childish's retro-regurgitations by the time the late-eighties clocked in, but since this one came out in 1985 he still had the goods about 'im! Faithful and authentic sounding enough takes on the fifties and sixties without flopping about like mid-eighties musicians trying to capture the glories of the past but being so modern and uppa date it mighta well have been Debbie Gibson! If I were even stupider 'n you I mighta even been led to think this was an archival dig dating back to the glory days of rock 'n roll as that teenage soundtrack to everything good and cut-rate! If you must waste your money, waste now.

***

Various Artists-STOMP BOUNCE BOOGIE BOSSA CD-r burn (Bill Shute)

It's a typical Bill-burn with the country and western, country and eastern (Vashti Bunyan), and a whole buncha records they never did spin on SOLID GOLD. The mom pitcher incidental music was funzy enough for me and I kinda liked the two duo platters (Gerry & Leslie & Toni & Terri---kinda reminds me of BOB & CAROL & TED & ALICE) plus the overt sexual innuendo of "Bounce Baby Bounce" is guaranteed to get just about any 12-year-old suburban slob boy rushing to the bathroom. And sheesh, Bill didn't fergit to add the usual garage band odes to teenbo woes which we sure could use a lot more of these rather fanabla-esque days.

***

Just a reminder. Like I have to tell you what it's all about, right? Sheesh, some of you guys really are a buncha dim bulbs now, aren't-cha!

MOOM PITCHER REVIEW! SHADOW OF TREASON STARRING JOHN BENTLEY, FATEN HAMAMA, ANITA WEST AND JOHN GABRIEL (England/Yugoslavia 1963)

I like low-budget thrill-packed international intrigue films, and maybe you do too. This '63 effort really does fill that bill in the way only a late-night UHF-TV offering from the sixties and seventies could, with longtime English star John Bentley playing an Amerigan jack of somethingorother who becomes the bodyguard  of a stripper after some toughie tries to assassinate her in a Trieste nightspot. That's only the beginning, what with yet another gal (who previously put her cigarette out on Bentley's hand and I don't think she was ever a member of Circle One!) and two World War II turncoats on the hunt for some treasure that the Nazis had stashed somewhere in Africa, and if you don't think that the more suspicious amongst the batch ain't gonna do all they can to grab the moolah for themselves then buddy are you mistaken!

It's actually good enough to keep your attention, though if you were watching this on some late-night UHF outlet you might be battling to keep awake before the National Anthem. Bentley is fine as the male he man lead, sorta reminding me of Dick Powell without the crooning while Faten Hamama does a pretty good Eyetalian even if she's from Egypt. And Anita West as the stripper is also pretty snazz-o even if there's something about her that makes me think she'd rather be auditioning for the lead in MARY POPPINS. The other two guys are slimy enough with John Gabriel as the mid-aged British sell-out and Ferdy Mayne as the Nazi waiting for a comeback to the point where I'm sure some of you'll be rooting for 'em the same way I find more empathy with the Germans and Japanese in World War II-era propaganda films because well...they sure ain't the squeaky clean two-shoe types that unfortunately peppered up "our" side!

But Bentley's natural acting ability and downright cool'll keep you from going total Third Reich with his nonchalance and standing up for everything manhood used to be before the great nut-lopping began way back in the seventies. For that alone you should see SHADOW OF TREASON lest what passes for manhood in today's world give you that automatic vasectomy that so much of today's "entertainment" seems bent on doing whether we like it or not!

How time flies! This past Wednesday and Thursday marked the 45th anniversary of the Fast/Suicide double header at CBGB, a show that I sure wish I woulda been able to see had I only known about the existence of the Fast or Suicide and had been old enough to attend or had been living in the area for that matter.

***

I know y'all have tuned in to read my own personal thoughts regarding the recent passing of none other than Roger Kynard "Roky" Erickson a week ago Friday.  I mean, you've read the rest so why not read the best!
But rilly, what can one say about the man who pretty much EPITOMIZED the whole idea of the damaged sixties rock 'n roller a whole more than fellow fallen compatriots Sky Saxon, Syd Barrett, Wild Man Fischer and Steve Took, the acid casualty who managed to become a true cult icon during an era when the lysergic stuff was frying more'n just scrambled eggs. At least there were more'n just a few kiddies were up and about buying those legendary International Artists albums during rock's musical epiphany 66-68 (ignore the naysayers who think it was all over by '67, and ignore the offal that made those people believe it was dead and gone at this point), and the seventies seemed to prove Roky and the Thirteenth Floor Elevators' everlasting imprint on TRUE rock 'n roll whether it be via Television or DMZ and Pere Ubu during their "Cloud 149" days (well, that was more Seeds-y). And we better not forget the "garage band revivalists" who, like the "Velvet Underground revivalists", the "Stooges revivalists" and way too many bright if misguided fans, captured the sound, style and maybe even some swagger in the process but never did get to the heart of it, the bared-wire intensity, the deep cut to the quick feeling that seemed way more meaningful to my suburban slob lifestyle than the "Kumbaya" crap they tried pushin' on ya in school ever did.

Still can remember the sonic shiver that hit me the first time I listened to "You're Gonna Miss Me"...that was spring 1978 (hadda wait for NUGGETS to hit the cutout bin depression-era waged kid that I was and spiritually will remain) and even then I knew it was the sole link between everything good that happened in the sixties and everything good that was happening at that time. Didn't have the brains to figure in the equally cool Seeds or Remains for some reason, but like those NUGGETS inclusions the Elevators had me craving more music like this which really seeped into my whole suburban slob sense of value the same way reruns and junk food did. And it was just as good for the soul as it was for the ears too.

Roky's life saga would have made an interesting flick given that the late-sixties filmatic sense was firmly in place. By the way, wasn't there a proposal or even a script goin' round in the eighties about some six-oh revival kiddies who hitch up with a faded former rock star who was a little too affected by demos past and present? Sorta like PERFORMANCE with a deep fried acid twist. I get the feeling this neo-Roky would never live up to the original thing but frankly, what can??? Considering what a dump H-wood has become I'm sure glad that such a film hasn't and hopefully will not be made, and considering how "The Industry" has totally forgotten Roky (unless ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY did mention his passing---you tell me!) maybe it's the best for all involved that he passed on in such relative obscurity while far lesser talents have gained all the riches and notoriety the likes of Roky shoulda been due for ages.

And another huge favorite dies and we're all gettin' older anyway, and as that feral past of primal sonic addiction died out as the new aura of slick and antiseptic sound permeates the landscape all I figure is---well, at least I caught some of this GLORIOUS UNIVERSE when it was up and alive.

YOU got any good Roky stories you'd like to share with us????

(Hey, what do you think of the mock moom pitcher poster repro'd above anyway? Thais originally appeared in the massive Roky Erickson piece [including an interview] which appeared in the twentieth issue of my oft-abused and ignored fanzine BLACK TO COMM the people pictured in that ad are are [top to bottom] John Battles, the man who put this piece together and deserves ALL the praise for it, me as a pre-teen Alfred E. Neuman fan, and Bill Shute doing his best to look like all of the Elevators on the back cover of EASTER EVERYWHERE at once. I believe I have a few of these issues still available, and if you're really that interested well, howzbout getting in touch and you know how!)

***

Hope you like these apples---not a rotten one inna bunch even tho a few might be better used for apple butter. Thanks to Billy, Paul and Feeding Tube for their efforts in this project.

Idea Fire Company-THE LIGHT THAT NEVER CEASES TO FAIL LP (Feeding Tube Records)

When I first plunked the needle on this thing I thought this sounded like an old Cecil Taylor album that just couldn't get started. Good thing I kept on listening because this Idea Fire Company ensemble have put out a rather different than the usual pus sorta recording that will remind you a lotta good things that made up your youthful musical mindset and expanded parameters the right and PROPER way. Closer to the seventies English minimalist sound (this would have made a better Obscure Records release than the Harold Budd PAVILION OF DREAMS one). In some ways this kinda comes off like a late-forties John Cage piano concert with Ornette Coleman sitting in. Well, it does if you USE YOUR IMAGINATION!

***

Various Artists-LE ROCK D'ICI A L' OLYMPIA LP (EMI Pathe, France)

This live platter featuring the hotter under-the-underground kinda groups of late-seventies France ain't the kinda effort you woulda expected had Skydog were given the honors. But it is---ok I guess. Hearing Marie et les Garcons romping through a couple disco hits (Village People and Amanda Lear if you care) ain't as snat as listening to 'em do their various "Sister Ray" redos, but it'll keep for now. Electric Callas' take of "I Wanna Be Your Dog" ain't the kinda things that punk rock dreams are made of either. But overall this is a fairly decent representation of just what was goin' on in France during the same time and space it seemed as if any kid with a head twisted on tight enough knew what the future of rock 'n roll was SUPPOSED to be, and it sure as shootin' wasn't the kinda drek the evil powers were tryin' to push on ya THAT'S a fact!

***

Taste of Blues-SCHZOFRENIA CD-r burn (originally on Ssr Records, Sweden)

There was a lotta good stuff comin' outta Scandanavia (and Finland!) during the late-sixties as well as a buncha goop (how Lester Bangs could give Tasavallan Presidenti a good review is beyond me!) but I gotta say this particular platter straddles the spheres. Some of it has an engaging jazz rock base with repeato-riff bass guitar and some fairly hot playing while others seem to come close to the standard Blood Sweat and Tears eclecticism doodle bag complete with the usual heavy testicle'd singer kinda vocals that were so in vogue then. You experience admiration to snoozeville track to track and stanza to stanza for that matter, and when it's all over it's sure hard to make up your mind whether or not this is a pretty raving outta-nowhere effort or another failed attempt at late-sixties zeitgeist. Wonder what Bangs woulda thought.

***

BILLY STRANGE PLAYS THE HITS CD-r burn (originally on GNP Crescendo Records)

I know that GNP hadda bank on more than the Seeds and Challengers, but I don't think this particular piece of guitar instrumental music was exactly the way to go. I gotta wonder if there even was an audience for Billy Strange's cheesedog takes on the latest biggies, but even if they were cheesedogs they do pack some sorta fun kick the same way those Mustangs records where they took on the Beatles did. I'll betcha that if it were 1971 and I found this is a pile of platters at some relative's place I'd beg for 'em to give me it until I was black and blue in the face...from the beating I got for being such a pest, that is!

***

AFRTS Mystery Theater Presents CARY GRANT IN "ON A COUNTRY ROAD" CD-r burn

More good ol' tymey radio here from AFRTS. From SUSPENSE we get Cary Grant as a hubby who, with his wife, is stranded on a Long Island road during the night in a thunderstorm while some crazy lady's on the loose chopping some heads off nearby. Already shaken with fear, the couple are even more terrified when some hysterical gal fitting the description begs to enter their vehicle and...yeah, this one's telegraphed to all heck but it's still worth the time to listen to. After that "GI Jill" spins forties Big Band records for lonely GI's to munch their MRE's to and, unlike some of these Armed Forces programs that I've heard it's not exactly time to defect...yet.

***

U.K. Subs-COMPLETE PUNK SINGLES COLLECTIONS 2-CD-r burn set (originally on Anagram Records)

I dunno why too many "enlightened" types pour wrath upon the Subs...these tracks actually stick closer to the ideal of what rock 'n roll used to be (and perhaps shall remain) with hefty guitar playing, strangulated vocals and an overall appeal that is reminiscent not only of the early English punk types but the Dolls and Stooges before 'em. Two solid platters of high-spirited, engaging music that certainly beats the whole stomach-upsetting socially conscious and relevant hippie music we've been hearing from way too many supposed punk rock anarchists these past thirtysome years! And the weirdest thing about it is, I've been rather unimpressed if not downright dismissive of these guys for quite some time!

***

The Lurkers GLM-THE FUTURE'S CALLING CD-r burn (orignally on Drumming Monkey Records)

Smooth and energetic enough punk rock of the late-seventies English variety, but when I'm in the mood for a Stooges or Mahogany Brain this type of music just doesn't cut the mustard, cheese or jugular for that matter. Oddly enough the more-loathed UK Subs did a better job of getting me into their "universe". For serious rock musique sophsicados only.

***

Various Artists-HARMONICA WITCHDOCTOR TWIST CD-r burn (Bill Shute)

Personally I really don't give a flyin' fanabla about any of the Alvin and the Chipmunks revivals from the eighties on, finding only the original worthy of my time and attention. So these early David Seville sides don't sound as cornballus as they most certainly were (and yeah, they were like a good encapsulation of hip corniness). Chuck Slaughter's Johnny Cash impression was impressive while Ray Bryant's "Shake a Lady" just reminded me of the lack of ladies there are to shake these days! The Timothy Leary track only makes me wish the Feds had caught him a whole lot earlier, and as for Les Fantomes well, maybe now you'll believe me when I tell you that French rock wasn't the terrible racket too many Francophobes have led you to believe o'er the year! Overall more educational and enlightening than COVER TO COVER WITH JOHN ROBBINS ever was!

***

Sixty-million (maybe that should read fifty-million!) rock fans can be wrong! After all, there's gotta be at least that many true rock 'n rollers on this planet who haven't read BLACK TO COMM, and judging from the sick state that music's in maybe they oughta shoulda! Hey, all I can hope is that someone out there will make that number fifty million, nine hundred ninety-nine thousand, nine hundred ninety nine (maybe that should read forty-nine million, nine hundred ninety-nine thousand, nine hundred ninety-nine!), and is asking that really too much?